Funnies

“I’ve been wanting to do a nude for a long time.”

“Once a caveman, always a caveman.”

“We’re being mocked.”

“It’s creepy, is all I’m saying.”

“80/20 chuck.”

“Your wife called. She wants you to pick up some mice on the way home.”

“Well, when I saw the Jackson Pollock on Route 16, I put two and two together, you know?”

 

“It’s performance art, you schmuck.”

“‘Camelot Executive Search.’ Why do you ask?”

“I wonder how long he’s been floating there?”

“He looks so peaceful.”

“Satisfied?”

“It’s not a good time.”

“You complete me.”

“I usually make a joke at this point about immersion therapy, but I can see you’re not in the mood.”

“Seriously? Do you know how many calories that is?”

“Happy hour?”

“Maybe some people can chat and decompose at the same time, but not me, okay?”

“Can you describe him for me?”

“How’s the food?”

“He’s running a fever, but that could be because he just came out of the oven.”

“At least it’s not Fox News.”

“Why do you always make everything harder than it has to be?”

“And today we have 287 specials to tell you about.”

“Murder-suicide, wouldn’t you say?”

 

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